Still feeling the energy from Sunday's "needs vs. wants" question. While a difficult question, it is probably a good one to pick up every once in awhile.
Just before we met, we got a long email from the Walker Wilsons, and I cut/paste it below. It is a fascinating read, and hope you take the time to read it.
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Thanks for the Mark 10 passage and assignment to list needs in wants from ones' bedroom--all four of us did it and found it really helpful. I am going to type verbatim Caleb's list but also then write a bit of reflection on the exercise from what the four of us discussed--not verbatim but the sentiments of Caleb, Ascher, Greg and I.
Caleb's needs:
school uniforms
7 short sleeved shirts
5 shorts
7 drawers (that's my fun word for underwear)
1 bathing suit
deorderant
a fan
a light bulb
electricity (which goes out here pretty often)
a mattress and sheet
a pillow and my one stuffed alligator I got when I was four
a broom and mop (not stored by his bed but ESSENTIAL for daily use here)
some books in English (to keep learning with)
some games (like cards and chess)
one soccer ball
Caleb's wants:
our kindle
a laptop computer
an internet connection (which is often missing here)
the wii (to play baseball and soccer on)
a bed frame (so the mattress isn't on the floor, I didn't have one for over a month here)
some other sports equipment (my baseball glove and ball, a basketball, a pump, tennis ball)
photos of family and friends from home
a few posters on my walls that I brought from home
a familiar sheet from home for my bed here (of course no bedspreads or blankets here--too hot)
1. Kenzie's question about whether a bed is a need or want is a great one. Here on the North Coast of Colombia it's so hot, humid, and damp, that mattresses get mildewy--even ours are and we don't live in poverty here nor do we have a thatched roof like lots of folks here do. So, the more practical way to sleep is in hammocks. It's much cooler (in terms of temperature), cheaper (mattresses are expensive), and they don't get mildewy. Most folks in the country side (called campesinos) have only hammocks and many families in town with beds also have hammocks and sleep in them on the hottest nights. In this climate, books and beds are just not very practical and can't hold up well.
2. One thing we noticed after only being here a month or two and that was confirmed in this exercise is that we have way more clothes here than we need. We brought our summer clothes (no jeans, no jackets, no long sleeves at all) but each boy had about 10 pairs of shorts and even more short sleeved shirts. They just don't need that many of either.
We have to wash clothes here very often--they are so wet with sweat that they'll stink if we don't get them washed. And without a dryer, we are dependent on the sun to dry everything. So sometimes it takes a few days post washing to be able to wear ones clothes again. Doing two loads of clothes a day doesn't work because there's not enough space to dry them (we live on the fourth floor and our balcony is small). Also we HAVE to wash sheets every week because they get so dirty and sweaty and we have lots of company but no extra sheets. Sometimes in the US we went 2 or 3 weeks between washing sheets, not here. Keeping up with the laundry is essential here and basically happens every day. In a weird sort of way, this means we just need less clothes than we used in the US.
An exception to that is underwear and socks. Our kids often have to take two showers a day--they come home from school and peel off hot uniforms drenched in sweat. So, lots of "drawers" and socks are a need here we didn't have as much in our life before.
3. We brought 3 bathing suits for each kid thinking we'd be here three years and they'd wear out. Now we're assessing that and thinking about giving one of each boys' swim suits away. They are super expensive here and it'd be good to share in that way.
4. It was cool that the boys quickly agreed their access to computer and kindle are wants and not needs. That said, they use them every day and it sure makes life more pleasant here.
5. Toys here in Colombia are an interesting topic: there hardly are any in homes or stores! And the ones that are for sale are very expensive and very poor quality that break quickly and would be the kind of thing we'd see in Asheville at the Dollar Store. A pack of 4 matchbox cars here (just 2 dollars a piece where you all live) costs about $15 US here.
Most wealthy families have cable TV and internet and a computer and those kids here spend TONS of time on the computer and watching TV rather than "playing" with anything--indoors or out. When our kids go over to a friend's house to play here, they are blown away by the absences of toys in their new friends' homes. Likewise, when kids here first see our legos and playmobile and various card games and games like scabble and boggle, their minds are blown too. Interestingly though, the Colombian kids have little interest in our cool toys (having never played with pretend toys in the past, I guess); they just want to play on the computer--a real bummer for our kids who just want to go outside somewhere (but where?) and play in a more active way when friends come over.
Each person in our family brought down here 2 suitcases--mostly filled with clothes, books, medicine and toiletries and our computer equipment, so you can imagine we don't have tons of toys here. Yet, even still, we own here more family games and sports equipment and "toys" than any person we've met here--even though most of the kids from the boys' school are far richer than we ever were in the US and have live-in maids, gardeners, belong to a country club etc. Despite that, they just don't have toys. It's not part of the culture and not available here.
6. Learning to live with lots less stuff (no couch, no carpets or rugs, no bikes, no car, very few things in our house beyond kitchen stuff and beds) feels good. But even still, it doesn't feel like we are following Jesus' command to give away our wealth to the poor and follow him. I guess that's because we still have all we need, the things you read above on our wants list, and all kinds of safety nets for the future when we return to the US again like our house and the chance to get jobs and buy a car and bikes again. This passage really got us thinking about what we have here that we don't actually need and could be sharing and about ways to stop holding on so tightly to stuff even here.
The part about leaving your extended family and your home and your land to follow Jesus feels pretty close to home by living here with MCC. Sometimes the gifts of this feel very close at hand and sometimes they feel elusive.
Joy had asked if there are things that Caleb likes about Sincelejo. Great question.
Here is an honest list:
delicious fresh fruit juices
watching soccer on TV
going to the beach for the day every 3 weeks or so (but there are no waves at all; the Caribbean is just like a big, warm lake, so it’s not as playful as the beaches we are used to)
having lots of holidays off from school
being in our hammock at night if there's a breeze and less loud traffic
Keep in mind though, Joy, that many things about living in Cuba would be easier than where we are. The hard divide between super rich and super poor doesn't exist there. Even poor people there have food and health care. There's no armed conflict there right now and both rural and urban areas are safe. The church and seminary in Matanzas have theology that fits with what your family believes (unlike churches here). There is grass there and places to play. And being homeschooled would be much easier to flex with than going to school here, I think. And it's far less hot temperature wise. So don't be worried that some of what's hard here for us would be the same in Cuba. Some of it might be, but lots of it wouldn't.
That's all for now folks. Love, Susanne (and Caleb)
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